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*I originally wrote this article in March 2015 and it appeared on cocomagazine.com
As you may have deduced from the title, I’m a single girl. For the past couple of years I was cool with being single, but lately I’ve come to the point where my single status is kinda played out. Read: It’s time for me to meet some eligible men!
My problem is that I haven’t made much effort to meet any guys. I spend way too much time in front of my laptop (I’m always writing / blogging) and I’m not really into the bar and club scene. So unfortunately my love life has taken a major hit.
Since my friends have heard me lament about my single status for what seems like an eternity, it’s been suggested that I look for a bae online.
My usual response to the idea of online dating is, “I’m a people-person and I like meeting people in a normal setting so I can see how we vibe together.” The last time I told one of my friends that, she reminded me that what I was currently doing wasn’t working, so venturing online was my only option.
I took her suggestion to heart, however, being an extremely cautious person, I decided to poll a bunch of friends and strangers and ask them about the pros and cons of online dating. Here’s what they told me.
PROS
Online dating is no longer stigmatized and relegated to the lonely and desperate- everyone is doing it! Many of my friends have found love online or know someone who has dated online and eventually met their spouse. There are even smartphone apps (Tinder) that cater solely to online dating. Online dating is here to stay.
Lies
Okay, people lie. They may lie about their age, weight or single status. Don’t believe everything you read.
PROS
As long as you have access to the Internet and time on your side, you’re good to go. You can log into your fave sites (eg Match.com, eHarmony, OK Cupid, BlackPeopleMeet, ChristianMingle etc) 24/7 and search to your heart’s content. Remember, you control the amount of time you put into dating.
Wasted time
Although dating online allows you to communicate with as many people as you want, you might find yourself spending a lot of time “online dating,” but the relationship(s) may not develop into what you wanted. The person may stop communicating with you or tell you that they aren’t interested anymore and you have to start the process all over again. You definitely need to practice patience.
PROS
When you are searching online, you can select whatever you are looking for in a potential boyfriend or girlfriend. You can specify age, gender, height, body type or even location. If you are looking for a 6-foot guy with dreadlocks with an athletic build from Toronto, put that in your preferences!
CONS
There are a lot of crazies in this world and for some reason they congregate online. Do not feel bad for blocking someone from your profile. Be careful!
PROS
The cost
There are plenty of FREE sites where you can look for a potential mate, and there are also paid sites. Do your research to see what site works for you.
CONS
The cost
Since you are dating a plethora of people to see which one you like the best, you are going out a lot. That might put a dent in your wallet. You need to come up with a plan or budget to accommodate all the dates you go on. Yeah, I know, not a big problem, but still! Lol
My verdict
I have to admit that my friends have almost sold me on online dating. I like that I can search for exactly what I am looking for in a guy and do it on my own time from the privacy of my own house. Hmm, maybe I will try online dating…? I’ll let you know.
*Please note, this article cannot be published without the permission from the author.
Hey Michelle.
I met my husband on Tinder! He’s great but I did encounter some nonsense with other dates before meeting him. It’s the same online as in real life. When you finally do meet in person you need to talk, vet them and take it slow. Online is just another venue to see what’s out there. Good luck!
Thanks for sharing that with me, Nicole! I’ve been nervous, but I am definitely thinking about it…..perhaps I’ll do a follow up to this post!